Tuesday, January 19, 2010

What a week...

Well, it's been a bit of an hectic one, this past seven days, and I for once feel justified in taking such an absence from my wee blogín. The previous video shows what happens when I drink coffee.

I get a wee bit hyper.

I've been hyper quite a lot this week.

So on Wednesday, I suited up again, brushed my hair (AND my teeth) and made for the middle of nowhere, North-of-London satellite of Harrow. WootHollaWootBuzz.

I had an appointment with an AGENCY who were VERY EXCITED to meet me and talk about possible jobs I might be able to finaegle from their haunted boxes of employment (computers) and earn some money to keep my massive heroin habit going and pay the families of those prostitutes I accidentally killed during 'the misunderstanding'. I arrived, fresh faced and bright-eyed (due to the cold) and when the young (NB. a very generous adjective to use there) lady who met me in the reception rushed forward, arm outstretched in greeting, I instantly noticed that she had put her jacket on incorrectly and was immediately distracted.

She seems to have missed her should when she put the blazer on, but only on one side. She looked like someone who had (very narrowly) failed an exam on how to put on a jacket. Dubious suspicion arose.

(Also, my first thought was 'Wow, maybe she's a hunchback, I can rub it for luck!' but that's not PC so don't tell anyone plzz)

I was taken (let's call her...) Jessica's desk, where I promptly knee-capped myself on her Hobbit sized furniture, and she started going through my CV. As we talked about how massively underqualified I was, I got the sneaking suspicion that maybe she WASN'T VERY EXCITED at all, as she seemed to know a disproportionately small amount about my employment history for the sentiments she had previously explained. Soon afterwards, I was given an admin skills exam (95% MOTHER-BITCHES, YEEEEHAAAAAAWWWWW!!! *fires pistols in the air*) with an audience of the other meno-youthful job sorceresses - who all giggled at my red braces - and then...


All that and all she could say was 'We'll keep your details on file'.

Not cool.

Okay, so then, when i was on the way home, my phone rings and one of the million (215) jobs I applied for gets back to me and asks me to come in. Unfortunately the guy at the temping agency couldn't tell the difference between 'Full-time Job' and 'Three Day Temp Position' and just...well...lied. I know, in this day and age. I lasted a day.

So I came back from THAT and

*angel chorus*

I get offered a full-time job.

Not only a full time job, but the full time job I had interviewed for an hour before I made that uber-hyper vlog post last Tuesday. They liked the braces.

So I'm jobbed. Sweet.

With that I took the weekend to heart. I had a five hour vid-chat with a really good friend (Mei Mei) during which time I drank two bottles of wine and spent a great deal of time showing off my ghetto speak -which is atrocious- and having one of the best nights in a looooooooooong time. THEN on Sunday, I met my first blog-friend in RL. SoFloBoJo is a very cool person, and we chatted for seven hours over LOTS of Guinness and Whiskey in a cool little pub in Maida Vale. It was a really cool day and made me eager to meet other London bloggers in the flesh. Although I could probably not drink the same amount again for some time.

Anyway, I hereby resolve to not whine about my job again, or ever foul up this once-beautiful blog with such mediocre shite again (Boohoo, I'm broke etc) for as long as possible.

So, yay, thank fuck.


  1. Thank fuck indeed -- and good on ya! Bloody well done, who'd have thought it was the braces wot won it for you -- I'll have to grab a pair myself since they're apparently lucky.

    Which is all a garbled way of saying you're a legend, keep it up -- and good luck with the new job.

  2. Congrats!
    You were definitely dapper in that suit! How could they say no?
    'Braces' is an interesting term for suspenders. If I hadn't watched the video, I wouldn't know what they hell you were talking about!
    Lastly: my ghetto be on point (lip smack)an' now u got a job I could teach some shit but u funda have to pay me cuz I got bills n shit.

  3. Note to self, buy a red set of braces ;) Congrats dude, enjoy the new empowerment, though you realise you will have no more excuse to drink at home alone? :P

  4. You are MY sunshine homie!

    CONGRATS on your new job!!!!!


  5. Congratulations, don't suppose you can send some of your luck my way, i don't seem to be getting anywhere atm lol.

    Whats your new job then?