Again, the Novelista Barista has thrown down the gauntlet to her blog-followers to interact with her and answer a random question every week as part of her Interactive Thursday.
This week:
'What is one song or album that you’ve listened to over and over again in a very rough period of your life? What is your sad song?'
Well, to answer her question I'll have to refer to two different songs:
Backwardly, my sad song. I'm one of those people who, by mixture of being a prick and a fool, has gotten myself into, and managed to fuck up (or get fucked up by) a whole load of relationships. Some of them I've almost forgotten, but others....well, not quite.
One of the ones that was important, we had a song. It was one that we played whenever we were hanging out in my flat, and it set the mood really well, as well as really helping me to relax (which I often can't really do due to my silly brain) and keeping us company when we had those great comfortable silences. It was the wonderful 'Comfortably Numb', by Pink Floyd. The version that I played was the 'Live in Berlin' recording with Van Morrison as guest vocalist.
But we broke up, and it hurt. I did the whole after-split mourning period with this song on repeat in the background, watching the complete docu-series 'The World At War' (to harness the 'rage' side of the break-up by watching the entirety of the War with Laurence Olivier's narration) and quaffing Apple Schnapps like it was going out of fashion.
NB: That's a really good way to break up and I got the idea from Charlie Brooker. The apple schnapps ideas is my own. It works, but hurts.
So when I feel really sad now, one of the first songs that I'll go to is this masterpiece.
But this pales in comparison to the 'Rough Time' song.
The song that I have listened to during rough patches, and which I listen to as often as I feel I can is 'The Court of the Crimson King' by the late '70s/early '80s prog-rock band King Crimson. The first time I truly appreciated this song was when I was living in the United States in the wee small town of Lexington, Virginia. I had returned home, slightly baked, to my little apartment when a FRICKING MASSIVE thunderstorm came out of nowhere and rent the night in two. The lights for some reason went, and I had to unplug all the electrical items in the room.
Luckily, my laptop was fully alive, so I was able to sit and listen to music whilst doing some writing, illuminated only by the glow of the screen. My back had been killing me for days so, in my altered state, I lay flat on the floor, when this wonderful song came on. My head swirling with thoughts and ideas for the stories which I had been working on, raced as the neurons stonedly dealt with what I had been working on. The lightening got really close to the house, and as I lay, humming along to myself, a massive sensation of euphoria overtook me, mixed with a great feeling of calm, a feeling which I very rarely experience. My mind was still racing, but not in the usual grey-hair way. Everything made sense, and everything was good. The song was almost perfect.
The theatrical nature of it; with its epic choruses, three-act dramatics, mystical lyrics and its underlying sense of reflection made me extremely happy. It was like someone had flicked on a lightswitch in my head, and the joint feelings of world-weary tragedy and hope that the song inspired really took a hold of me. It was one of the greatest ten minutes of my life, sad as that sounds.
Since then, if I've been going through a really rough patch, and nothing really seems to make sense, I just lie on the floor, put on my studio headphones and crank up the volume...
Here ya go Jen, I hope you enjoy these songs, and thanks again for a great Interactive Thursday question.
Con
:)
Showing posts with label Interactive Thursday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Interactive Thursday. Show all posts
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Interactive Thursday
Howdy! I was supposed to be spending the next three days on a boat for the Maidstone River Festival, but when we came back from the (absolutely beautiful) beach at Camber Sands in East Sussex, we were all completely exhausted, stroked by the sun and in my case (after jumping into the sea like an over-excited dog) as salty as any regular seaman (Pun intended)
We decided to leave the boatery until the morrow, after we've all slept.
Jen, from the uh-maze-ziiiiiing!!! blog the novelista barista has, as part of her great series 'Interactive Thursday', posited the simple interactive request:
"Write about what u do when ur life sucks.. how do u get out of a funk.
bc i need to know the answer!"
So, as part of Interactive Thursday, I'll try to answer.
My silly head can swing between being in a sorta happy buzzymood to being ridiculously depressed. I used to spend way too much time worrying about what that meant until I got used to the idea that the jump between hyper and comatose (by way of assholeness and lazy-bastardness) led, apart from the annoying parts, to a much more interesting and eventful life.
What I've found though, is that my most favourite hobby, writing, follows these mood swings like a canoe on the sea. Sometimes,, when I'm on a buzzy high, I can spend hours and hours writing and coming up with new characters, stories and plots. The opposite happens when I'm down, or rather, the water turns choppy. If I'm pissed off, heartbroken, hungover or similar, I can use that to keep writing, and find it adds a different perspective to what I'm trying to say. However if it's a REALLY bad case of the blues, I find that the usual symptom is twofold; boredom and writer's block. The boredom is bad, but the writer's block is like having a limb removed, so it's necessary to act.
The answer is quite simple, but took me ages to come up with, although it'll probably be really obvious to everyone else.
I do stuff.
I find that if I even go for a walk, and try to notice something new or previously hidden about the sights and sounds I pass everyday, my mood can lift. One time, I was in a MAJOR depressive low, my friend suggested we go for a drink and then go to a ballroom dancing class. Despite the fact that I had previously spent seven hours watching 'The World At War' and feeling sorry for myself, I had one of the best nights ever. Nothing get's rid of the blues by half-drunkenly waltzing around with a bunch of strangers whilst pretending to be cool and suave.
It's a bit paradoxical. When the world seems like a concrete pigeon has taken a crap on my head, often the last thing I want to do is go out. However, if I try really really hard to not be an antisocial arse-biscuit, the low mood, even if it's terrible will eventually shift.
Some funks or major depressions can last for days, weeks even, and then it's the best thing in the world to have a safety net of friends to hang out with (even if it's just to drink tea and watch the match in silence) so that you're not alone in the flat all the time. I would advocate the acquisition of a girlfriend/boyfriend for people, but being depressed is never the best excuse to go chasing girls (as i've found out at my peril) and then some.
Really, the best answer about how to get out of a major funk is to never allow yourself to get bored, that's when the devil makes work for idle hands. Stephen Fry (a fellow upsy-downsy chap) said that he'd love to write a book called 'The Secret of Happiness' with nothing in it but five words and three hundred empty pages, 'Stop feeling sorry for yourself'. I dunno how that would work (especially for a moay SOB like me) but he has a point. If you never allow yourself to get bored, instead of spending your time alone and depressed, and keep an active enough life, the funk can be successfully avoided. Perhaps a combination of actvity and trying not to wallow too much (volunteering or charity work can help) can combat the funk.
Plus, when I'm active and going on adventures, I find I have better stuff to write about. We'll see how bored I can be after a weekend on a lovely boat.
I hope this helps :)
Con
We decided to leave the boatery until the morrow, after we've all slept.
Jen, from the uh-maze-ziiiiiing!!! blog the novelista barista has, as part of her great series 'Interactive Thursday', posited the simple interactive request:
"Write about what u do when ur life sucks.. how do u get out of a funk.
bc i need to know the answer!"
So, as part of Interactive Thursday, I'll try to answer.
My silly head can swing between being in a sorta happy buzzymood to being ridiculously depressed. I used to spend way too much time worrying about what that meant until I got used to the idea that the jump between hyper and comatose (by way of assholeness and lazy-bastardness) led, apart from the annoying parts, to a much more interesting and eventful life.
What I've found though, is that my most favourite hobby, writing, follows these mood swings like a canoe on the sea. Sometimes,, when I'm on a buzzy high, I can spend hours and hours writing and coming up with new characters, stories and plots. The opposite happens when I'm down, or rather, the water turns choppy. If I'm pissed off, heartbroken, hungover or similar, I can use that to keep writing, and find it adds a different perspective to what I'm trying to say. However if it's a REALLY bad case of the blues, I find that the usual symptom is twofold; boredom and writer's block. The boredom is bad, but the writer's block is like having a limb removed, so it's necessary to act.
The answer is quite simple, but took me ages to come up with, although it'll probably be really obvious to everyone else.
I do stuff.
I find that if I even go for a walk, and try to notice something new or previously hidden about the sights and sounds I pass everyday, my mood can lift. One time, I was in a MAJOR depressive low, my friend suggested we go for a drink and then go to a ballroom dancing class. Despite the fact that I had previously spent seven hours watching 'The World At War' and feeling sorry for myself, I had one of the best nights ever. Nothing get's rid of the blues by half-drunkenly waltzing around with a bunch of strangers whilst pretending to be cool and suave.
It's a bit paradoxical. When the world seems like a concrete pigeon has taken a crap on my head, often the last thing I want to do is go out. However, if I try really really hard to not be an antisocial arse-biscuit, the low mood, even if it's terrible will eventually shift.
Some funks or major depressions can last for days, weeks even, and then it's the best thing in the world to have a safety net of friends to hang out with (even if it's just to drink tea and watch the match in silence) so that you're not alone in the flat all the time. I would advocate the acquisition of a girlfriend/boyfriend for people, but being depressed is never the best excuse to go chasing girls (as i've found out at my peril) and then some.
Really, the best answer about how to get out of a major funk is to never allow yourself to get bored, that's when the devil makes work for idle hands. Stephen Fry (a fellow upsy-downsy chap) said that he'd love to write a book called 'The Secret of Happiness' with nothing in it but five words and three hundred empty pages, 'Stop feeling sorry for yourself'. I dunno how that would work (especially for a moay SOB like me) but he has a point. If you never allow yourself to get bored, instead of spending your time alone and depressed, and keep an active enough life, the funk can be successfully avoided. Perhaps a combination of actvity and trying not to wallow too much (volunteering or charity work can help) can combat the funk.
Plus, when I'm active and going on adventures, I find I have better stuff to write about. We'll see how bored I can be after a weekend on a lovely boat.
I hope this helps :)
Con
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